"27" Anson, Lasagna and Christmas

 

This was a very enjoyable chapter for me. Now that Jakob has risen above his rough years, it is nice to see — and write! — the positives in his life.

Click here to read Ascension: Jakob’s Ladder, “27” [Chapter 9].

As the author, I found challenges here in this chapter as well as joys. The lasagna dinner with Anson was written in Hi, I’m Lance, but that was all written from Lance’s perspective. Now I had to rethink the experience from Jakob’s point of view. That was interesting.

If you are interested in comparing:
Click here to read Hi, I’m Lance, Meeting 110 [Chapter 31].

I think what I enjoyed most about writing this chapter was the conversation with Oliver at Christmas. There was a lot of emotion there. People in conflict are usually relatable because the individual realizes he or she is not perfect. In the case of Oliver, watching others be happier is something to which everyone in the world can relate. We all do that. Humankind seems to want what other people have. The true enjoyment of those scenes was the interaction between brothers. When siblings are young, they fight, they tease, they argue. It is as adults that each person comes into their own. The teasing and fighting is done at a more mature level (hopefully). I have to wonder how many families become closer as adults than they were as kids. Some definitely drift — often for good reasons — but some almost become friends more than brothers or sisters. Watching Jakob interact with Oliver is also a bit of fun.

Among the readers out there, a few might inquire, “Why did you just gloss over the wedding?” Good question. Obviously, the wedding is major, so it needed to be discussed between Jakob and Trevor. I just felt the experience between Lance and Jakob would not differ significantly. Each of them had “saved” the other, and the commitment was just as strong with both of them. A major retelling didn’t seem necessary.

If you wish to relive the wedding, click here for Hi, I’m Lance, Meeting128 [Chapter 33].

I suppose I should point out the obvious. Ascension: Jakob’s Ladder was intended to tell Jakob’s whole story. An abundance of new text has been written, but all of that was his early years. For the first time, this chapter goes beyond where we left off with Lance and Jakob. I hope you have enjoyed the continuation of their story. There’s more to come.

"26" Jakob Meets Lance

 

Finally.

I so wanted to get here. We all did. I said from the beginning that Book Four would be darker. Thankfully — as we knew he would — Jakob has survived his past. I cannot fathom having any readers of Ascension: Jakob’s Ladder that did not first read Hi, I’m Lance. If so, please let me know … and bravo. That was a lot of tough years to get through. I would certainly be impressed.

Click here to read Ascension: Jakob’s Ladder, “26” [Chapter 8].

Click here to read Hi, I’m Lance, Meeting 4 [Chapter 1].

All of my stories have their own niche. Extracurricular simply introduced our first three characters. If It Weren’t For the Two of Us had Trent’s journal. Lance’s book had its meetings. Jakob’s story is told by years. We are now caught up to where you (as readers) were introduced to him. Some of the flashback scenes are familiar to you, others are new. But seeing them through Jakob’s eyes, I hope there is a fresh take on what you recall. It’s all now placed into the context of his life. (And I do indeed have a distinctive niche for Books Five and Six. 😊 )

Just because we are caught up to age 26 doesn’t mean the book is done. Ascension: Jakob’s Ladder goes to age 30. A few chapters ago, a reader asked me if I was keeping the reason Jakob was talking to Trevor a secret. He was speculating on many theories on what prompted their conversations and what might have happened. It is true, I haven’t shared it yet, but it is only a few weeks away. I was so intrigued by the reader's thoughts. Fascinating.

The toughest part of this chapter was summarizing half of Book Three into this one year. As Jakob explains life to Trevor, I worry that the slow-build relationship of Lance and Jakob just doesn’t come off clearly enough in a single chapter. Alas, that’s where I have to depend upon readers to remember all those things from Hi, I’m Lance.

By no means do I think Jakob is a Cinderella story. It was not an overnight miracle transformation. We have to remember that as Lance and Jakob’s relationship was growing, he was living in a homeless shelter. It was gradual, not fast at all.

The joy of their love story is them finding each other and making the other individual a better person. That is the reward of Jakob’s story: through it all, he found the love he deserved.

More to come…

"25" - Real vs. Fantasy

For those readers who pay close attention, they might notice the last chapter was 22 and the new chapter is 25. This might prompt a question or two. Let me explain.

In my “books,” my main goal is to create love stories between men, but I want my characters to be relatable and therefore, the narrative will seem very realistic. That means my men are flawed, and their mistakes sometimes have sad consequences.

When I decided to tell Jakob’s full story, the bits of information written in Hi, I’m Lance started the framework. From that, I had to flesh it all out. Jakob is four years older than Lance, so I had to start his tale with him being 17, which he had shared, and his caring time with Anson. From there, only glimpses of roommates and the art fair were given, so there was a lot of space for me to fill. By the time I got to “22,” I felt I had covered the hardships rather well. A 23, 24 and 25 would have just been really tough. Realistic or not, those were some years I could omit. I just condensed it down to a single chapter, thus the jump from “22” to “25.” (I’ve had readers already tell me the dark chapters are just too tough.)

People around the world have lousy roommates and great roommates. I feel the mix that Jakob has had to live with is pretty indicative of the variety that people might encounter. The jerks — particularly when drunk — I don’t feel are too unrealistic. I haven’t endured what Jakob has gone through, but I’ve know a lot of assholes, for sure.

But I digress. From the beginning, I’ve said this book is darker. But now that we are past the halfway point, we know things brighten soon. We’ve defined who Jakob is as a whole. I’ve felt I’ve kept it real to get to this point.

Click here to read Ascension: Jakob’s Ladder, “25” [Chapter7].

While my stories are certainly fictitious, I feel I’ve kept them grounded. The Nifty platform emphasizes the sexual content, of course, but I hope the scenes play out as realistic. I confess I haven’t read an abundance on the site, but I’ve seen a fair share of those that have coaches and students getting it on, or dads wanting to be dominated by their son’s best friends, etc. To each his own; there is an audience for that, I suppose. I just want my characters to be individuals with traits with which readers can identify. Fantasy scenes are one thing, but I want my characters to develop, not just make it to the next locker room scene, if you catch my drift.

I am sure that is why I really don’t care for my first two chapters in Extracurricular [Book One]. Mike and Trent weren’t developed enough. The locker room scene just seems trite looking back. It is when they go out for drinks afterward that they begin to develop some depth to their characters.

Fantasy may be the grail for some readers who just might want to get off. I hope I'm respecting the reader by going a little deeper. I like keeping it real.

I think we can all look forward to Jakob meeting Lance next chapter.

The Hardest Chapter I've Ever Written — "22"

Hate me. Go ahead. I deserve it.

I think we've all seen movies where something so horrific or tragic happens, that it rips our heart apart or makes us curl up into a ball. Those dark moments help define the person as a whole.

When readers were getting to know Jakob (with a K) — and even me as the author — in Hi, I'm Lance, he hinted at a horrible day where he and his sister had run into each other five years after leaving home.

Click here to read Hi, I'm Lance, Meeting No. 7 [Chap. 4]

When I wrote that, I didn't have intentions of doing a book on Jakob. I just knew he was going to be someone that helped Lance grow as a man. When Hi, I'm Lance ended, Jakob had grown on me so much as a character that I felt I wanted to tell his story. However, I knew — just from the plot details in Book Three — that the first half was going to be tough if I was going to do an accurate portrayal of his life. There are moments of joy and compassion, but there are several years that just aren't pleasant. That's what the character had to endure.

Writing the worst day of his life was the hardest thing I've ever had to write. I'll admit I can cause my eyes to tear up when drafting something so heartwarming and loving. This is the opposite. These people aren't real, but just as we feel for favorite characters in television shows or movies, we still feel emotions for these literary figures too.

I apologize if you found this chapter too harsh. I felt in needed to be. We saw the beginnings of Jakob emerging from "survival" to actual living in Hi, I'm Lance. Here, when this book is complete, we will see him grow many years beyond Lance's story. We're now at the halfway point, so we know Lance is almost in his life. Until that moment, forgive me for fleshing out the hard years. I knew Book Four would be different than the original trilogy. Skipping by years and the darker tone made this book stand on its own, rougher as it is.

Thank you for your support of my writing — and Jakob. I believe you will find the rewards in the second half to be worth the investment into this character.

21 - Graham

 I knew going into posting Book Four that many people would not relate to it. I hadn’t planned on writing Jakob’s story when Hi, I’m Lance was happening. Once the trilogy was complete, I thought I was done. But then I wanted Jakob’s story to be told, but I knew it would be dark — for at least part of it. I know for sure that some people just don’t care for this story. They have stated it is not my style of writing, but the darker tone just isn’t for them. And I can understand that.

I am happy that this chapter is a little gentler. It’s a reprieve through the tough times. Graham is a character that is just secondary, but I like him. It’s a shame I can’t develop him further, although he does make an appearance later in the book.

Click here to read Ascension: Jakob's Ladder, 21 [Chap. 5]

Certainly I have never been in the situation Jakob finds himself in just to survive, but I hope I’ve had kind people like Graham along the way. From a gay standpoint … no. I said in the last post that I wasn’t Timothy. There were times that I felt a misfit in the gay world. I’m sure many in the community do. There is no manual. There were plenty of stereotypes, and when you didn’t fit them, you felt somewhat alone. In today’s day and age, being who you are seems to be more accepted. There are less molds one had to conform to. But we all still need kind people.

As Jakob talks with Trevor, he is 30. When introduced in Hi, I’m Lance, he was 26. As Ascension: Jakob’s Ladder progresses, we won’t see him at each and every year. There will be some jumps. In fact, there are only two more chapters before Lance and Jakob meet. Much of the first half is about Jakob’s struggles in his younger years of adulthood, but there is so much reward to come. The second half should make you truly feel wonderful for Jakob. Patience.