Gay In the Workplace

Trent's job search is on.

Read Chapter 22 here.

I am completely "out" at my workplace today. Being myself is honestly a blessing. In my years of teaching, that wasn't the case. In my last few years, most my coworkers knew, but the students didn't. I did not want to endure the drama that "a single parent" could whip up into a firestorm. Teachers are scrutinized enough as it is. They are expected to be perfect in all split-second situations: teacher, mentor, guard, parent, counselor, supervisor — for 22+ kids all at once. They don't receive enough credit.

I have teacher friends in other states who are very out. Their particular schools strive for diversity. I applaud their courage.

Some jobs are more accepting of being gay. Thankfully, times have improved. Once the Supreme Court ruled for equality in marriage, that made a huge step.

At the same time, it would be naive to thing "all is good." It's not. Clearly there are instances where being one's true self can get you fired. Gay people are more visible now than ever before on commercials, television, movies — and we're making baby steps in professional sports. But I often realize that the average person doesn't know or understand that extra layer of caution and anxiety many people in the workplace have draped upon them.

Because I had to feel that way, I assume it made me a bit more understanding of the Black Lives Matter movement. I wasn't going to fall into the trap of "All Lives Matter." They do. But that wasn't the message, nor was it "Only Black Lives Matter." Everyone should be able to say "I matter." I got it.

Here's a spoiler for you since you're reading the blog: a hint for something waaaaay down the line for Trent... his homosexuality will impact his job. I'll say nothing more.

Comment below.

Chocolate Mousse and Drawer Space

Chapter 21 is now posted.

Find Chapter 21 here. 

If you have read this chapter, you'll recall Mike made space for Trent within the bedroom. Little steps like that are significant in a developing relationship.

My current relationship started out as long distance. When I was able to stay for a lengthy time in a state that wasn't my own, just having a bit of space was substantial.

So how about you? Were you in a situation to where a lover or partner offered you some space of your own in his own home? What did it mean to you?

Now that Trent has to be on his own, where will his own place be? Within the next couple of chapters, the situation will become agitated. There is an abundance of uncertainty for Trent. Just how Mike — and Lance — interact with circumstances make Trent's steps forward even more confusing.

Let's Dance

A stereotype of gay men is that we are all great dancers. I can't say I'm that good, but I like dancing anyway.

Working in restaurants straight out of college, I soon found myself dancing with coworkers following our shifts. My "Christian college" upbringing didn't allow for nightclubs in those formative years, but I made up for it following my own graduation. It indoctrinated me to many things.

Dancing plays a part in Chapter 20.

Click here to read Chapter 20.

I happen to like the scene in which Lance experiences his first gay club.

My first clubs were not gay, but I knew I loved being on a dancefloor rather quickly. Clubs that had mirrors were lots of fun in my opinion. One of my favorites (not in my hometown) had a turntable dance floor. I thought it was the coolest thing. A shame it is gone.

When the opportunity arrived for me to dance with a man for the first time, I found it just as easy. I spent way too many nights dancing into the wee hours — and oddly going out to eat in the early hours of the morning following. Those nights were the latest I've ever stayed up in my life.

Parents

Trent's Mom plays a part in Chapter 19

Click here to read Chapter 19.

It has been a long time since I told my parents I was gay. My words were: "I think I have found the person I may want to spend the rest of my life with." Dad's reply was: "What's her name?" When my response started with "HIS name is ..."

They were deer in headlights. I knew it was a shock. Parents need time. It's hard for the transition — on both ends. But for me, there was just a huge sense of weight lifted off me. Huge. Being deep in religious faith, it was news they would never wish to hear. I knew it would be awkward for a while.

And, of course, there were several ridiculous questions. But that was okay. Parents should be allowed those. Over time, things have worked out. Mostly.

The Name of the Book

Well, it took Chapter 18 to get around to the title of the book.

Find Chapter 18 here.

I had asked a few of my readers to whom they thought the title referred. I think most people assumed it was Mike and Trent, but others thought the developing friendship between Lance and Trent might mean the title refers to them.

Now we know.

Heaven knows this book is far from over. Trent's life is beginning as a college graduate — and his first adult relationship.

By the time I reached this point, I admitted to myself that the first two chapters I ever wrote [Extracurricular, chapters 1 and 2] were my worst ever. Here's some background. When COVID hit and all of us found ourselves staying at home — and climbing the walls — I went on a cleaning rampage. I had found papers (yes, papers!) that I had scribbled down those two chapters years and years ago. At the time I wrote them, I was younger and, on a lark, just wanted to write something erotic and "hot." When cleaning, I figured it would make sense to just trash them. After rereading them, I thought: "Why not just type them up?" I did. Then I continued. It was the most rewarding diversion I experienced during shutdown. Who knew I would keep writing. I'm now close to finishing the fifth book.

But back to those early chapters. When I write about Mike just cringing when he thinks of that shower scene — that's me! Who those young men were (and where they were in their lives) in chapters 1 and 2 of Extracurricular seem nothing like the two men who eventually fell in love. That's why I despise those chapters. However, it was that very event that is the catalyst to all the Jackson Bend characters, so ...

Read Chapter 1 of Extracurricular here. The adjacent link will take you back to my least proudest moments.

But here we are. I'm curious as to how this latest chapter of If It Weren't For the Two of Us struck you. I hope you enjoy it — as well as the road ahead.

Graduation!

I remember my college graduation (barely). Compared to some celebrations you might find in many stories written (such as mine), there was no drunken all-nighter for me. Coming from a Christian family ... nope.

But I do remember the scary decision of "What now?" I didn't have anything lined up. I had to make a decision of where to live! My parents moved towns while I was in college, so I didn't have any real connections to the new town — and it was small. I was fairly familiar with the nearest big city, so that was an option. But there was another city in a different state that seemed to offer more. As fate would have it, all aligned and set me on my journey into adulthood. It would be nine years until I accepted who I really was. But things got continually better, and I rarely regretted any decisions I made.

Trent is at all sorts of crossroads. 

Read Trent's graduation (Chapter 17) here.

If you have read this chapter, you know a big change has come at the end. I can recall that time for me as well. I was much older than Trent, but ... parents. 

I hope you are enjoying this story of Trent's transition from college life to the real world. It's just getting ready to take off in all new ways. Enjoy the ride.